There are some things in the world that just feel great: feeling clean sun-dried sheets on a hot day; smelling flowers that have been given as a gift; tasting coffee brewed by your favourite barista; seeing someone you love laughing.
One of my favourite feelings is putting on old jeans or opening an old bag and finding money that I had forgotten about. It does not have to be much – even five bucks can feel like a win. It is that experience of having something that until a moment ago I did not realise I had.
I have had a couple of experiences like that recently – finding a bank cheque I forgot to cash; closing an old account with much more than I thought it had; getting a tax return. Now I am actually quite organised when it comes to financial matters, so these little bits of cash have been surprising and welcome. It is resources I did not know I had.
I find the same experience when working with my clients and they come to a realisation about themselves and their lives that surprises them.
These insights range from what is distinct about me as a leader to what do I want most in life. They include realising what fears are holding us back, what doubts we are afraid to speak and what dreams we still want to live.
These are the hidden resources that we can only uncover when we give ourselves the time and commitment to change something in our lives.
Realising what you have never seen, forgotten or hidden from yourself can open up a whole new way of seeing yourself. It can in itself change who you are being in the moment. It can indeed change your world and flip it upside down.
My recent research project proved that many women lead very busy lives, with multiple roles and responsibilities. It also found that we are our own worst enemies, keeping ourselves from feeling satisfied by our negative self-talk and lack of confidence.
I believe that that busy-ness keeps us from finding those hidden treasures within us: our values, strengths and ability to change. It keeps us listening to old messages about who we ‘should’ be and keeps us from living lives we love.
One way to challenge these negative messages is to give some time to self-reflection: allowing us to touch base with our authentic selves and hear what that voice has to say.
Working with a transpersonal coach is one way to learn this practice, however it may not be for everyone. Meditation and other mindfulness practices can also support you.
It is finding a quiet space within and without and holding it past the normal judgements, doubts and fears.