If I had one wish, it would be that I could wave a magic wand and give people who tend to doubt themselves, all the confidence they deserve. Unfortunately life doesn't work like that and confidence is earned by taking risks and learning new skills.
Your confidence can also gain a boost from getting some honest feedback from those around you. Whether it be by directly asking or by noticing the way others work with you and value your contribution.
If you feel that your confidence has fallen a little bit lately, here are three sure fire ways to give you enough, to re-energise you and to move forward with your goals.
1. Stop the comparisons: One sure way to lose confidence is to compare yourself to those around you or to where you think you should be in your career, business and life. If you find yourself looking around you for validation, take a break from social media and other sources that reflect a life you think you should be leaving. Be it your siblings, friends or professional peers, no one else is living your life and should be used as a yardstick for who you are and who you want to be.
To quote Joseph Campbell:
“If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it’s not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That’s why it’s your path.”
2. Take a step today you would not normally do: Confidence comes from the little changes you make that take you just outside your comfort zone. When you make a small step, you give yourself time to adjust to the new situation without overloading your "hot-wiring" that wants to keep you safe. Starting to move out of your comfort zone is best done in small, manageable and achieveable steps. So even if it is just a little change, like going to work a diffferent way then usual or buying your coffee from someone new, challenge yourself gently to get out of your rut and see what life could be like from a different point of view.
3. Be grateful: When we connect to feelings of gratitude, our fears and anxieties are naturally calmed. So at those times when you feel yourself less confident - starting a project, meeting someone new - take a moment to remember something in your life for which you are grateful in that moment. It does not need to be big or momentous or what you "should" feel thankful. It may just be the fit of your shoes or that you had fresh fruit for breakfast. It's something that confirms that in this moment you have and are "enough" before going on.